the walk-by glance

What did he/she mean by that?  Have you ever been walking down the street, glanced at someone and they just kept looking forward pretending not to see you?  Have you ever just been gazing around and noticed someone looking intently at you?

Yes you have, and so have I.  There is a lot of subconscious thought that goes behind each of those thoughts.  Here are some examples:

1. Guy walks by and looks at girl, girl fidgets a bit and looks intentionally forward: maybe she didn’t notice the guy, but most likely she did.  You can just tell.  Nobody looks straight ahead for that long without blinking.  I’d say almost all of the time, unless we’re in a rush, we notice people that smile at us when we are walking by them.  So why doesn’t the girl look back.  Well, I dunno.  But one likely reason is that she is worried.  She is worried about how the guy will interpret that look, and what might come next…. Don’t worry! We’re just smiling!

2. Guy walks by and smiles, girl smiles back: She’s just being nice.  Even if you pretend she is doing more, and you approach her, she likely will just pretend that she was “just being nice.” Best move: Smile back, and hope you meet her again.

3. Guy walks by and gawks at girl: Guy is just being an asshole.  Ignore him. 🙂

4. Guy walks by and looks straight ahead.  Girl looks at guy.  OMG.  This is a rare occasion.   If the guy notices he is happy.  Last time this happened to him was when little cindy asked him to dance in the 3rd grade.  If he doesn’t notice, and the girl did it intentionally then the girl is probably a little upset.  Why didn’t he notice?  Jeez.  I was just trying to be nice.  Guys fault this time.

5. Guy and girl walk by each other, neither of them look at each other.  Neither of them smile. Maybe they are both busy, but they might have just missed their chance.  So smile next time, and hope to meet them again. 🙂

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Media loves us

So i’ve been thinking some more about love today 🙂

I came home and cooked myself some pasta, and my roomate turned on the bachelor.  Its pretty amazing how many people watch shows like this.  Just as one point of reference, a single blog post from Jake — today’s Bachelor has >450 comments. Do we like drama?  Sometimes yes, but more likely when the subject has to do with falling in love.  This exists in every culture I have experienced — Latin’s most popular shows are telenovelas where men and women go through a series of acrobatic emotional acts in order to run after this thing we call Love….Indian’s don’t have the bachelor, but they have bollywood, and let me tell you — if you thought Hollywood has capitalized on Love, Bollywood really has taken it to the next level.  I’d say over 90% of movies produced by Bollywood are about love, and no not just a simple sex scene in the middle of a movie, but about two people trying to find love together, while not having a food fight at every other encounter.

The list goes one.  Love is probably one of the most prevalent emotions in media, and corporations have long understood the power of this emotion — Google recently showed the world that perhaps the strongest emotional response to a search engine would be “use google to find love”  Watch this years super bowl ad here

In short, next time you turn on the radio, flip through TV channels, or look at what is playing in the theater, take a look and see how many of those shows are about love?

Why write about love?

Well, there are many reasons.

For one, its something we all want. There aren’t many things on this planet that every person wants. Except maybe sex, but thats related to love. And yes, love means different things to different people, different cultures.

But thats what this blog is about. What does it mean to me, and to you? This is not an exercise in defining love, for that would be impossible, as love is an ever-growing, evolving essence. It changes as the people around us change, and even when we have found love, that love with that person is also evolving. In fact if love isn’t evolving, it probably means it is dying.

The second reason to write about love is because its complex. It is hard to understand, it is hard to measure, it is impossible to hold in your hand. Yet, when we have it, we know it, and we are in bliss.

So maybe this is a blog about bliss, and the role that love plays in bliss. In fact the most interesting thing about love and about bliss is that in order to create it usually takes pain. Why do some of our happiest moments come after times of extreme difficulty? Why isn’t there love without effort? Don’t look for me for answers, but perhaps you can look at me for thoughts.

Thats what I’m here for. Thoughts about love.